Pronunciation: "yoofu'mizum"A euphemism is a word (or phrase) which people use in place of terms which are more disagreeable or offensive to themselves and/or to their audience. When a phrase becomes a euphemism, its literal meaning is often pushed aside.

   Bop the Baloney
   Freeing willy
   One man tug-o-war
   Self-Love
   Fiddle the Ferret
   Tickle the Pickle
   Flong your dong
   Jerk off
   Beat the meat

   Changing your oil
   Making nut butter
   Doodle your noodle
   Giving it a tug
   Crank the Shank
   Drain the main vein
   Devil's handshake
   Menage a moi
   Cleaning the pipes

   A high school english teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. She tells the class there would be no excuse for not showing up, except for serious injury or illness, or a death in the student's immediate family. A smart-ass jock in the back of the room asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?"
   The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says..."not an excuse. You can use your other hand to write with".